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Greetings, Second-Lifers!
In my recent post on the BloodLines vampire role-play for Second Life, I documented my experience with this “dark” role play genre, and my distaste for such pursuits, and promised, via a blog comment that I’d do a follow-on piece consisting of my own “Interview with a Vampire”.
Well, dear reader, I’ve conducted that interview, not with one, but with two of my “friends” from Second Life, who valued my friendship enough to be rather upset with me for removing them from my friends list, and invited me to discuss the issues that led to my actions.
Also, in one of the responses to this blog, I was taken to task by an “anonymous” comment that noted that I, while claiming not to “moralize” about dark role play, had done just that. Touché, “anonymous”! I wish you didn’t hide your identity, as I’d love further dialogue with someone so obviously capable of sharp analysis and constructive criticism; one is never too much of an “old dog” to learn a new trick or two, even from someone much younger.
First off, let me recount something worth documenting here, in relation to my experience with the BloodLines product:
Their own website and terms of service state that by messaging certain key personnel, one may have one’s data removed from their records. I contacted the “maker” of the products, received a polite and prompt reply that my data and avatar name would, indeed, be removed, and was quite happy with that result. Then, on Tuesday morning, Sept. 2, after the long “Labor Day” weekend, I returned to work to find that my corporate “Inbox” contained a Google Alert with a link directly to the BloodLines website, where I am documented as having my “soul” owned by another Second Life account name, as having been “bitten” four times, and as having a “Clan” membership, and as being only “82% human”. This information is stored on a public website, and is now also stored on my corporate email server. Just a note of caution to those who think that their Second Life activities can have no effect on their real life pursuits; as of this date, September 5th, the information is still resident on the BloodLines public website, and I’m debating legal recourse to have it removed.
Now, to the gist of this post, and a much more positive note:
I spoke at length with a couple of friends involved in dark role play, and specifically in the BloodLines vampire “game”, and came away with a renewed appreciation for the nature of these pursuits, as well as a somewhat lessened sense of revulsion at the topical characteristics thereof. It seems that for many, playing these games merely represents a sense of “family” within Second Life, and a like-minded affinity for a movie- or literature-based form of “play”, all regarded as pure fantasy and fun, and allowing the participants to cultivate a sense of “belonging” or affinity with one another, quite harmless and in fact contributory to their sense of well being. I still don’t embrace the menace, the blood-related nature of it all, but I think I’ve learned that perception is everything, and for those who’ve done RP for long periods, the benefits can far outweigh the negatives in these online (and sometimes real-life) pursuits.
One of these friends spoke to me at length of his multi-year history of dark role play in text-based forms, and of his own efforts, when faced with depressive or behaviorally affected personalities who perhaps shouldn’t be involved in such activities, in contacting the FBI or other agencies of assistance, in the interests of preventing potential suicide or homicide related to the RPG “actor” in question. Of course, my thought is that if one is mentally imbalanced, prone to depression or rage, or under treatment for such maladies as bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and the like, perhaps dark RP is just something that should be left completely alone; for me, at least, that is my personal decision, and I still would not spend one minute in pursuit of blood, slavery, or other potentially depressing topical content.
I also spoke with a dear Second Life friend about “dark role play” in general, someone who is close to me, and who shares my distaste toward the objectification of people represented in Gorean slave-trading, for instance. However, she recounted to me an incident in which she had messaged a Gorean “slaver”, who had appeared in a public venue in Second Life, with his group of three “slaves” in tow, and had asked him what possible joy he could derive from such activities. The response, to one like myself who is repulsed by the “roles” but always intrigued by human nature, was nothing short of highly educational and thought provoking. The individual told my friend, in private conversation, that he is a quadriplegic, totally dependent upon others to take care of even his most mundane of daily needs. He cannot urinate, defecate, feed, or cleanse himself, without asking someone else to help him or to actually perform these tasks we all take so for granted. So, when he uses Second Life, he chooses the power, influence, and independence of being a “Master”, and capturing submissives, then controlling their activities, which gives him a sense of control and power that he’ll never achieve in his real life, and a therapeutic “outlet” perhaps, for his frustration at the powerlessness of his real, physical state. Wow, makes one step back and consider!
I still choose to be “real” and pursue happy and “upbeat” things in my Second Life. I will never understand the attraction of signing up for a massively immersive virtual environment, then relinquishing your “persona” to the control of another. But some, it seems, have this need, or desire, or just have such low self-esteem that they’re more comfortable with someone else in the “driver’s seat” of their virtual life. Wrong of me or anyone to judge, I’ve decided, and “live and let live” is the way to be, methinks.
You see, dear reader, I’ve learned something, here: SL is populated by “players”, and by “people”. They are one and the same, but then again, they’re not. If the guy or gal you take up with is deep in a perceived “RP”, then you may or may not be getting anything resembling truth from their tales, commentary, or claims of affection. "I love you" may mean, "You're dumb enough to believe this crap! ha ha!". That’s just a fact of Second Life.
I’ve been fortunate to find real business contacts, real people, and real social exchange in Second Life, and I’ve also had my brushes with the “gamers” who really don’t give damn who they hurt, in pursuit of their fantasy or “points” or perceived “advancement”. I still choose to remain somewhat naïve, vulnerable, and completely honest and open about who/what I am, as a man, as an avatar, and as a Second Life resident, but others do not, and that’s their right. One minute of genuine love, respect, integrity or companionship is worth every hour of pain when it all goes terribly wrong, in my view. Silly old romantic, I am, but it's my decision, just as biting folks may be someone else's.
There is an “upside” to the RP genre, for many, and I’m glad they share this wonderful platform for their activities, and some of my better friends and contacts are among them, often using “alts” for their dark and brooding “persona”, while appearing in another account as “normal”, whatever that means.
My only caution? Be careful with your heart, out there, and recognize that Second Life is like a tabloid newspaper; believe half of what you see, and none of what you hear, and take each day as it comes. Sow what you want to reap, and it’ll come back to ya, in spades! Sort of similar to First Life, isn’t it, after all?